Where are the Good Men?

+JMJ+ Once again, we’re watching a tragic and infuriating scenario play out in the news: a young male victimized by a predatory adult woman. To summarize briefly without going into detail, a young female teacher has been accused of raping a teenage boy. Although, not surprisingly the article states that the teacher has been “accused of having sex with a student.”

Um, no. Let’s call it what it is. It’s rape.

Once again, the social media comment sections are flooded with vile, ignorant, and heartless responses and they’re mostly from men. Instead of outrage and defense of the victim, we see drooling over the abuser, jokes about “luck,” and even blame placed on the child.

Let me be blunt: this is evil.

Abuse is abuse, no matter who the perpetrator is, no matter who the victim is. A child cannot “want it.” A teenager (male or female) cannot “consent” to being groomed and exploited by an adult in a position of power. And any man who justifies this kind of abuse because the abuser is “hot” or “looks good” needs a serious reality check (not to mention a moral one).

To anyone trying to shift the blame onto a victim, how incredibly ignorant and disgraceful. If you’re capable of using a phone or computer to comment on social media, then you’re capable of using that same time and energy to educate yourself. Learn about the grooming process. Learn how predators manipulate and exploit. Ignorance isn’t an excuse, especially when it causes more harm.

Grooming is strategic, manipulative, and psychologically damaging. It’s how predators condition children, teens, and even adults into compliance. If you can’t understand that (or don’t want to accept it), you are part of the problem.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a woman who believes masculinity is toxic or that all men are bad. Far from it. I believe in the beauty, strength, and holiness of authentic masculinity, and I know many good, honorable men who live it out daily. Abuse isn’t exclusive to one gender, and men certainly aren’t the only ones capable of committing it. The very case I referenced involves a female perpetrator and a male victim. It’s far more common than many people realize.

My point is to call out the double standard and the blatant hypocrisy we often see when it comes to abuse. Yes, I’ve seen women make ignorant, victim-blaming comments too—believe me, I’ve seen it and even experienced it firsthand. But more often than not, I see men making light of abuse, especially when the abuser is a woman and the victim is male. The mockery, the jokes, the perverse glorification—it’s not just insensitive. It’s dangerous. It adds to the culture of silence and shame that already keeps so many victims from speaking up.

We Need Good, Holy Men

We need real men to stand up and speak out—not add fuel to the fire. The world is burning because men (and yes, women too) have been desensitized by a pornified culture, numbed by contraception’s empty “take what you can get” promises, the convenience of abortion, and shaped by a society that treats innocence and purity as disposable. Too many men have allowed themselves to become consumers of lust, detached from truth, and indifferent to evil (unless of course it directly negatively affects them).

Where are the good men? Where are the gentlemen who honor virtue, protect the weak, and say “enough” when they see abuse paraded as entertainment?

It’s not “manly” to laugh off the abuse of a boy by a woman. It’s cowardly. It’s sick. It’s disgraceful.

We need men of integrity—men who understand that being male doesn’t mean conquering women, children, or even other males, but honoring them. We need men who defend the dignity of every child, not just when it’s convenient or when it fits their political or personal agenda.

To the Good Men

To the good men out there who are leading and standing up, thank you. Please keep speaking out. Your voice matters. We need more of you. The world needs more of you. Boys need more of you. Girls need more of you. The Church needs more of you.

Real men don’t just build, they protect. They don’t just lead, they serve. They don’t mock victims, they fight for them.

We need a new generation of men who aren’t afraid to call out evil when they see it, even when it’s unpopular—especially when it’s unpopular.

This is about basic human decency and moral clarity.

To the so-called men excusing or glorifying abuse: grow up. Get a spine. Stop being spineless, pervy cowards. You’re not clever. You’re not cool. You’re complicit.

It’s time for more men to rise up, to lead, to repent, and to protect.